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Small talk plays an important role in American culture, as we discussed in a recent post.  However, too much of a good thing can backfire: that is, produce the opposite of the intended (good) effect.  

When we have a special request or favor to ask of someone, starting with a little small talk is natural, but if we do NOT have a close personal relationship with that someone, it’s often useful to limit initial chitchat to 2-3 exchanges, and then introduce our request with minimal context … and ASK!

Let’s strategize about small talk first, and then the request.  Why strategize?  Because we’ll probably be a little nervous: asking for help from people outside our closest social circle can be psychologically demanding.  This isn’t something we do every day, so choosing the right words and the right way to say them can be challenging.  

If you intend to ask a favor of an acquaintance, associate, colleague, or anyone else who is NOT a close friend or relative — and especially if you haven’t spoken to this person in a long time — try to limit small talk to one minute or less (unless your partner keeps it going by asking YOU some questions).

This little bit of foresight may help you avoid a one-sided “exchange”:

A: Hi!  Long time no talk!  Wow, it’s been so long since I’ve seen you!  How have you been?  

B: [short response]

A: Did you go anywhere for the holidays?  

B: [short response]

A: So how is everything?  Are you still teaching at the university?  

B: [short response]

A: How’s your wife doing?  Is she still in the fashion industry?  

B: [short response]

A: Oh wow, that’s great!  And your parents — how are they doing? 

If you find yourself driving this kind of “interrogation,” cut it short: your partner will be relieved!  Notice this example includes a couple of “dead-end” yes/no questions likely to elicit yes- or no-only responses.  

But there’s an even more serious problem here: the question content may be unwelcome.  Your partner may not be in the mood right now to discuss work, wife, or parents — especially if your relationship is not close.  Imposing such questions could even affect how the other person responds to your eventual request.

Now let’s consider how you might structure your request.  Expect to feel a little anxious (it’s normal) and do your best to push through it.  Express your purpose in two very short parts — CONTEXT (essential background information, condensed into one sentence or phrase) and REQUEST:

CONTEXT: Well, the reason I’m calling you today is that I’m looking for a job and … 

REQUEST: … I was wondering if I could ask you for any suggestions you might have about …

Note that the CONTEXT does not tell a long story.  Long-story-SHORTextremely short! — is our goal here.  

And notice the REQUEST features indirect words to soften its impact: 

I was wondering: common introductory softener; signals that a request (or other special/sensitive remark) is coming, alerting the listener to a “turn” in the conversational flow.

if I could ask you: “if” conditional, with the burden of action on the speaker “I” asking, not the listener “you” giving (NOT: “if you could give me …”); this additional signal gently & politely announces, “Incoming question!”

any: meaning “any possible” or “if you happen to have any”; the speaker does not assume the listener has suggestions to offer, which lowers expectations and helps lighten a request.

might: conditional modal, with an implied if”: if you happen to have ideas, if you can think of anything spontaneously, if you would be willing to share your thoughts.

In most routine situations in the USA, you’ll probably receive warmer and more thoughtful responses to your requests if you limit small talk, get to your point relatively quickly, choose words that burden YOU instead of the other person, and soften your wording with a few “if”s, “might”s & “any”s!

An earlier version of this article appeared as a post in NYU’s English Language Institute blog on April 16, 2021.

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“I see you’re wearing a Yankees cap.  Are you a baseball fan?”

This is small talk: something we often do to start a conversation.  Notice the comment (“Yankees cap”) + question (“you a fan?”) structure — we’ll come back to that soon when we discuss techniques.

But first — why bother reading about small talk?  After all, you probably do it naturally with people you want to interact with.  That’s great … but remember those awkward times when you wanted to interact with someone but couldn’t think of the right thing to say? 

Small talk can be a BIG challenge for anyone facing new or anxiety-inducing situations, including many key moments in our careers.  And small talk can be a BIG deal in relationship-building: people prefer to socialize and do business with others they feel comfortable with, and this sense of comfort can be established & maintained through light conversation that feels natural and builds rapport.

So making a little effort at strengthening your small talk skills can enhance your personal & professional encounters.  Here’s a simple formula that can remind us what small talk is, and what it’s for:

small talk = SHOWING INTEREST

You may ask: What if the person or situation is too new to make me feel “interested” yet?

I hear you!  That’s why the key word SHOWING is helpful.  Showing interest can come from (a) having genuine interest and expressing it … or (b) making an effort: finding something — anything — to comment on!

In the “Yankees cap” example, (b) is likely to apply to me, as I’m not a Yankees fan; I’m not even a baseball fan, and I have no natural interest in discussing baseball or baseball hats … but hey: I’m making an effort by noticing something and remarking on it!

You may ask: What if the person or situation is too intimidating or tense, and I feel literally frozen?

I know — I’ve been there too!  Sometimes we have to “break the icebefore showing interest.  (The “ice” in this idiom indicates the initial frozen state of a new social situation; the awkward paralysis of people together not communicating.)

One of the easiest ways to break the ice is asking about the weather.  This works even for remote video-conferencing and phone calls:

“How’s the weather where you are?”

Notice this question doesn’t even require knowing where the other person is, which makes it very easy to use.  It leads naturally to discussing where the other person is, where you are, and suddenly the “ice” is broken, the conversational stream is flowing, and now you can show interest!

“I heard you say you’re from Italy.  What part of Italy are you from?”

That’s another example of the comment + question structure.  Comments set context for questions, and sometimes even prompt them: I may say “you’re from Italy” without knowing what else to say … and “What part?” naturally emerges!  

And by adding space between questions, comments create more comfortable pacing: focus on me (comment); then you (question); me; then you.  And you, I hope, do the same!  Asking questions only turns small talk into an interrogation, which can be unpleasant for your partner.

The “Italy” example features an information question (“What part?”), which unlocks more conversational potential than most yes/no questions do.  Information questions — those beginning with who, what, where, when, why, which, how — elicit specific and often revealing responses.  In contrast, yes/no questions may result in one-word answers: “Yes.”  Or “No.”  And nothing more!

As your small talk warms up, think of simple questions — especially information questions and yes/no questions with like — to follow up on what your partner says:

— “Did you like growing up there?”

— “Oh really?  Why?”

— “When was that?”

— “Where was that?”

— “That’s interesting; and then what happened?”

— “Wow!  How did you handle that?”

Follow-ups are short, easy to generate, and more fun to answer.  Since they demonstrate you’re listening and showing interest, they encourage meaningful conversation and transform small talk into real engagement.

A version of this article appeared as a post in NYU’s English Language Institute blog on April 1, 2021.

A Good Time for Writing

December 4, 2020

Quarantine 1

With the current pandemic prompting restrictions on public gatherings and onsite classes, we’re all more physically separated from each other.  Devising your own independent study activities can be a reassuring way to engage with the world … and keep your joy-of-learning flame burning.  

Communicating at a distance means that writing is probably playing a more significant role in your life: you may be composing more text messages, emails, and written assignments than ever before.  As your need to write increases, along with enforced time alone, consider refining your writing skills with the help of the best teachers: good writers.

Quarantine 2

Start from the source: books, stories, articles, and other texts that you find interesting and well-written.  The “you” part here is important: allow your own preferences, feelings, and instincts to guide you.  This is a chance to explore writing that is meaningful to you — NOT what someone else chooses for you or claims you “should” read.  

Notice sentences that make an impression on you.  Did you like one particular part of a piece you just read?  Did the opening page of a novel have a mysterious or magical effect on you?  Did your boss or teacher write something so useful or clear that you’d like to emulate their technique?  

Re-read those sentences carefully.  What did you like so much?  Why do you think so? 

The answers to these questions can lead directly to improving your own writing skills, but you’ll need to exert some energy.  Are you ready?   

Quarantine 3

If English is your second language, try a back-translation — a challenging but effective self-directed activity: 

a) Translate several well-written English sentences or paragraphs into your first language.

b) Wait a few days (or longer) so you can forget the details of the original English.

c) Without looking at the original text, translate your translation back into English.  

d) Compare your English translation with the English original, notice the differences … and learn from them!

Back-translation is a simple idea, but doing it takes commitment and effort!  So limit your first attempt to just a few sentences that really interest you: a short excerpt that struck you as useful, meaningful, or beautiful. 

The final step — comparing your back-to-English translation with the original — will show you how you can improve your written English.  You’ll notice differences in word choices, sentence structures, and punctuation & style elements that you can immediately apply to your next writing task.  Pay special attention to aspects of the original that you did NOT include or incorporate fully in your translation: these oversights will show you what you need to learn, as opposed to what you’re already good at.  

One rewarding aspect of this comparative analysis is that you choose the material and you manage the process yourself.  The text itself is the key, the writer is your virtual teacher, and you are in the driver’s seat.  Drive on … and enjoy the journey!

Quarantine 4

A version of this article appeared as a post in NYU’s English Language Institute blog on December 1, 2020.

(photos by Lloyd Bishop)

Learn with Lloyd!As you know, vowel sounds in English can be confusing: we have so many different ways to spell them!  Consonant sounds can be challenging too.  And stressing the right syllables in words is especially important in English.

Refining your pronunciation is a long-term process, and the older you are, the more modest your expectations of progress must be.  Children can mimic and reproduce the sounds of second languages quickly and accurately, but if you’re past your teenage years, you’ll likely find pronunciation work a challenge.  However, you can learn to make subtle adjustments that will improve the way you sound in English!

One exercise you can start with is reviewing SINGLE vs. DOUBLE vowel sounds — read ALOUD the words that begin with the same consonant (for example, “f“) on the LEFT side below … immediately followed by the word(s) that begin(s) with that same consonant on the RIGHT side:

Notice how the two vowel sounds on the LEFT side are added together for the blended double sound on the RIGHT.

Now read ALOUD the words in the charts below in the same way:

If you’re color-oriented, notice that the two primary colors on the LEFT side of each chart are the “ingredients” for the blended complementary color on the RIGHT side — this visual reference may help reinforce the skill you’re working on: blending two “pure” vowels into a double vowel (diphthong).

Here’s another single-to-double-sound chart for you to practice reading ALOUD:

How do you like working on your English pronunciation skills? It can be fun — like working on music or singing skills — and even more fun with an instructor, whether in person or remotely.

If you’re an adult second-language learner, keep your expectations for progress modest … and if you practice skills one by one (as illustrated above), you’ll find that gradual, modest progress is not only possible, but enjoyable!

If you’d like individual coaching/instruction on your English pronunciation, please contact me directly (see my “About Lloyd” page — link at top right of this page).

Enjoy learning!

~ Lloyd ~

With so much content on the internet to use for refining your English language skills, the choices can seem overwhelming!  One site to include in your listening diet is The Moth (TheMoth.org), a public radio program / website / podcast dedicated to storytelling: people tell true personal stories in front of a live audience.  Like moths drawn to a flame, we humans are powerfully attracted to stories told “around the campfire” (actual or proverbial), so a storytelling-focused site is likely to entertain and enlighten YOU … as you hone your listening skills. 

Here are some tips on using Moth stories for language practice:

-1- Visit TheMoth.org and browse the most recent episode of The Moth Radio Hour (“See This Episode”), which usually includes 3-4 stories: scroll down to see titles, storytellers’ names, and one-sentence summaries.  The length of each story is listed in minutes:seconds (e.g., 12:47).  Browse other links on the site to find additional programs and stories.

-2- Some — but NOT most — stories offer a transcript, which can help you confirm your comprehension and study details like new vocabulary.  When you use a computer and link to a story title, a “Read Transcript” link may appear below, along with the more common links “Listen Now” and “Add to Playlist.”  You can also search the site for the key word “transcript” — a list of stories with transcripts will appear. 

-3- Consider borrowing a “The Moth Presents” transcript book from the library, featuring full scripts of popular stories: the two latest editions are Occasional Magic (2019) and All These Wonders (2017).  You can look over the first part of a transcript to identify a story you like, and then locate the audio at TheMoth.org.  To vary your practice, listen to stories with — and without — the transcript.

-4- Listen to the first 2-3 minutes of a story to discover whether you like the content and speaker’s voice — if you’re not interested within 3 minutes, try a different story.

-5- When you find a story that interests you, listen to all of it … and then listen again for details you missed the first time.  If possible, use a transcript to study new vocabulary in detail.  

-6- When you’re familiar with the content, use the story AGAIN for pronunciation practice by playing it phrase by phrase: PAUSE after each short phrase (a short sentence, or one part of a longer sentence), REPEAT it ALOUD … play the next phrase, PAUSE, and repeat!  

-7- If you like The Moth and want to receive the latest programs and episodes on your smartphone, subscribe to the podcast version.

Although professional performers sometimes appear on The Moth, most storytellers are ordinary people who have compelling stories to tell: their “pitches” are screened by Moth staffers, and if they’re selected to perform, storytellers receive tips and coaching on effective ways to present their stories.  The result for YOU is well-told tales that may make you laugh, cry, or both … and worthwhile content to help you enhance your own English language skills!

(photo by Bonnie Yoon Bishop)

This article originally appeared as a post in NYU’s English Language Institute blog on March 18, 2020.

Near the end of my English language listening/speaking-focused courses, students often ask me, “How can I continue building my skills on my own?”  

You’re probably already using audiovisual resources, but visual “eye candy” can consume so much of your attention that you don’t concentrate enough on language issues.  Consider audio-only resources, which focus your mind on listening: you immediately notice aspects of vocabulary, pronunciation, intonation, and grammar that demand your attention.

Try public radio sites like NPR.org (National Public Radio) and WNYC.org (NYC’s own station), which offer top-quality news and feature stories you can use to boost your language skills. 

ACTIVE listening with NPR.org:

a) Search for key words of interest or particular shows — click the menu icon (with three short horizontal bars); shows like “Morning Edition” and “All Things Considered” offer new reports and stories every day, and archives of past shows.  Most features are 3-8 minutes long; choose one.

b) Listen without pausing to get acquainted with overall content.

c) Listen again and pause as needed; notice things you missed the first time.

d) Read the transcript to see how well you understood everything.  Transcripts offer immediate feedback on your listening accuracy.  Research the meanings of unfamiliar words.

e) Listen again while reading the transcript to reinforce the content in your mind and focus your ears & eyes together on language issues.  

f) Listen again, pause after each short sentence and in the middle of longer sentences, and repeat what you just heard.  Imitate pronunciation & intonation to refine your speaking skills.

g) Each day, repeat these steps; follow your instincts, adjust as needed, and trust your judgment.

PASSIVE listening with WNYC.org:

a) Subscribe to the WNYC app or other podcast platform offering WNYC content.  

b) Listen to live broadcasts while doing other things, like exercising, preparing meals, or washing dishes.  

c) Don’t worry about missing content — you’re busy and cannot possibly catch all the words.  You can miss 90% and still benefit from English streaming into your ears.  And don’t worry about transcripts when listening passively — just allow quality audiocasts to become part of your daily routine.  

(photo by Bonnie Yoon Bishop)

This article originally appeared as a post in NYU’s English Language Institute blog on December 11, 2019.

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You’re not going to magically become a better writer just by reading.  After all, would you expect to become a better speaker just by listening?  If you want to build your writing skills, you have to do one thing: write!  Doing assignments for a class is important, and revising after receiving feedback is especially important.  But if you really want to improve your skills, challenge yourself to write regularly … not for class, but for yourself.  Give yourself writing tasks:

Try a back-translation — a challenging but effective self-directed activity (follow the steps for this process outlined in my blog post “A Good Time for Writing”).

Keep a writing journal: Write for 15-30 minutes every day, no matter what.  Write about anything that comes to mind; if nothing comes to mind, write about nothing coming to mind!  It’s good language practice, and writing about “nothing” is still writing; after a few minutes, the very act of writing can stimulate your idea flow.  Journal writing can improve your abilities to organize your thoughts and express yourself precisely, abilities that apply to both writing and speech.

Self-Dictation: Choose an article or story you enjoyed, and record your voice reading it aloud, and then play back the recording as a self-dictation.  Write each sentence, pausing or replaying the recording in the same way a teacher delivers a dictation in class.  Finally, check your spelling and punctuation against the original text.  Regular dictations/self-dictations will improve your writing skills.

Copy good sample paragraphs and entire essays or other documents: Get deeply acquainted with a writer’s word choices and sentence structures.  The text you choose serves as your “tutor” — it demonstrates good writing, and you absorb the lesson well because you’re doing it … not just thinking about it.

As a learning tool, copying is not taboo!  If you consider a particular sentence, paragraph, or essay well written, analyze what makes it well written.  If you want to learn to write like that, copy it!  Copying is a natural way to learn any craft.  Most human skills are acquired largely through imitation: artists copy masters to learn their techniques; musicians practice the works of other musicians and composers; babies learn to speak by imitating adults; second-language learners imitate first-language models.  Unfortunately, the taboo against copying other people’s ideas inhibits many student writers from using copying as a tool for building writing skills.  But this kind of copying is entirely different from plagiarism; private writing practice exercises are not the same as false public presentations of others’ ideas as your own.  Copying is a natural way to boost your writing competence.

Follow Good Examples

Start noticing how writers write.  When you like a piece of writing, examine it closely.  What part did you like the most?  Why?  Did you like certain words/phrases, or the simplicity or complexity of a particular sentence?  What kinds of sentence structures impressed you?

In addition to pieces by professional writers, documents written by your boss, your teachers, your faculty advisor — anyone whose writing you’d like to emulate — are worth considering.  And be sure to examine published articles, brochures, websites, and reports that relate to your field or specialty.  Such documents may serve as excellent models for your own professional writing.  Imitate good models — not just by reading them, but by moving your fingers: respond to them in your writing journal, record and use them for self-dictations, or copy them!

Avoiding Writer’s Block

April 26, 2020

Learn with Lloyd!

The Writing Process

Do you suffer from writer’s block — the inability to write when you desperately want or need to write?  If so, you may be mixing your two distinct roles as creator and critic.

Writing requires creative efforts (planning and drafting) and critical efforts (reviewing, refining, checking, and changing).  These two efforts complement each other when applied at different times, but compete with each other when applied at the same time.  Writer’s block often results from trying to create and criticize simultaneously.  It’s as if two parts of our brain were at war with each other!

Creativity is about “What if…” “How about…” “Let’s try…” “Maybe…” “Yes!”  

Criticism is about “That’s awkward.” “Too simple.” “Doesn’t work.” “Not right.” “No!”

For a smoother, more enjoyable writing experience, and to help yourself produce your best writing, separate your creative efforts from your critical efforts.  The next time you’re facing a professional, academic, official, or creative writing task, try this approach:

CREATE
-1- Plan
-2- Draft

Take a break!

CRITIQUE
-3- Refine
-4- Check

Here are some thoughts on each step in the process:

A. CREATE

1. Plan: Think, make notes, sketch, outline, or roughly map out your basic ideas.  Focus on your purpose — why are you writing this particular document?  What do you want the reader to understand?  What is your main message?  What are other key points you want your reader to know?  If you’re stuck, try five minutes of freewriting.*

*Freewriting means writing whatever words and thoughts come into your mind — without editing at all.  Such freestyle writing can be completely off the topic: irrelevant personal thoughts, disorganized sentences, even silly ideas.  Sentences like “Well, I’m supposed to write but I have no idea how to start” are welcome.  This technique helps some writers establish a connection between their natural thoughts and the artificial act of writing.  After a few minutes, more relevant ideas will flow and the paralysis of writer’s block will be broken!

2. Draft.  Focus on your goal and purpose.  Don’t think too much about writing well — it’s too early in the process to worry about being clear, concise, courteous, complete, or correct.  Let your ideas flow into your fingers spontaneously, roughly, awkwardly, messily, and quickly.

* * * STOP.  Take a break.  You need to relax your creative engine and let a calmer, more critical perspective return.  Even a 3-minute break will help you see your rough draft with a fresh eye.  Don’t mix the creative and critical processes. * * *

B. CRITIQUE

3. Refine: Review and revise.  Move sentences, paragraphs, and entire sections.  Take another break and do it again.  Put yourself in your reader’s place and slowly read from the beginning: are the order and flow of your ideas logical and clear?  Are your paragraphs easy to read?  Are your sentences easy to understand? 

If not, rewrite, rewrite, rewrite — several times, if necessary.  Professional writers rewrite extensively, so how can you expect not to rewrite?  Ask another person to review and comment on your revised draft. 

4. Check: Only when you’re sure your latest revision is the best possible one, make final adjustments and edits.  Finally, check for spelling, grammar, and punctuation errors.  Discipline yourself to postpone this final check until the last possible moment.  If you do it too early, you may be wasting your time, as your refining efforts (Step 3) may not be complete, and you may end up rewriting entire sections of your draft. 

*  *  *  *  *

Try to apply this process to your next writing task.  The most profitable part is the first one: planning.  Most people want to get writing tasks done as quickly as possible, so they begin writing what they think will be their final version.  If they’re wise, they begin to realize that what they’re writing is just a first draft, which will need refining and checking.  

Planning allows you to discover, organize, and structure your ideas in advance to save time in drafting, not spend extra time!  Give yourself the gift of planning, and know that your initial “writing” is really drafting — and you’ll immediately become a better writer.

Making “Yes” Easy

April 26, 2020

Learn with Lloyd!A simple technique in the art of persuasion is presenting your points or requests in small steps — manageable bits of information that your conversation/negotiation partner can readily agree with or easily say “yes” to.  Here’s an example of comments/questions designed to elicit a positive response, step by step:

Some of us in the office have recently gotten involved in helping the neighborhood around our building.  We’ve had a lot of fun doing things like A…, B…, and C…, and the response from the community has been great.  We were wondering if you might like to join us sometime.  [Hoped for response: Sure!]

Our next project is D…, and we’re going to start it this Saturday.  Would you be interested in working with us on Saturday?  [Hoped for response: Yes, that sounds interesting.]

We’re planning to meet in front of our building at 10 a.m.  Would you be available then?  [Hoped for response: Yes, I think so.]

Great!  See you then!  [Hoped for response: OK!]

* * *

We’ll examine the structure of these sentences in a moment, but first, look at this less effective approach, which  packs too much information into a single request and may be less appealing to the listener.   A quick, positive response is less likely here:

Several of us in the office are planning to do some volunteer work near our building this weekend.  Are you free this Saturday morning around 10?  [Possible response: Uh, I think I have something going on this Saturday; maybe another time.]

 * * *

Effective Persuasion — COMMENT + REQUEST Structure:

You can enhance your powers of persuasion by making it easy for the other person to say “yes.”  Below is an analysis of useful elements in the effective example at the beginning.  Notice the comment + request structure in each of the first three exchanges: instead of aiming a single question at a time, the speaker creates context with a comment and then follows it immediately with a short request (direct or implied).  Also notice how the comments get progressively narrower in scope.  Comment 1 begins with broad perspective and background information:

Comment 1: Some of us in the office have recently gotten involved in helping the neighborhood around our building.  We’ve had a lot of fun doing things like A…, B…, and C…, and the response from the community has been great.  [Introductory sentence provides background, context.  Second sentence emphasizes two positive points — “fun” and “great response” — while giving specific examples “A…, B…, and C…”]

Request 1: We were wondering if you might like to join us sometime.  [Phrased as a statement; “we were wondering if” and “might like to” are usefully indirect, conditional elements; “sometime” is usefully ambiguous, avoiding early mention of Saturdays/weekends.]

Comment 2: Our next project is D…, and we’re going to start it this Saturday.  [Offers specific description “D…”; full-day reference to “this Saturday” avoids early mention of morning start time.]

Request 2: Would you be interested in working with us on Saturday?  [Phrased as a question; “would” is a useful conditional; “interested in” focuses on the other person’s interest/feeling instead of requester’s need or demand.]

Comment 3: We’re planning to meet in front of our building at 10 a.m.  [Notice each comment is getting successively narrower.  Here the specific time “10 a.m.”  is introduced; this potentially unappealing detail is withheld until late in the conversation.]

Request 3: Would you be available then?  [Phrased as a question; “would” is a useful conditional; “available” is a relatively objective term focusing on the person’s schedule instead of any desire to get up early on Saturday!] 

* * *

Here are some more examples involving marketing or promotion of the speaker’s services:

Less effective — single question:
Can you give me your email address?
More effective — COMMENT + REQUEST:
C:
I’d like to send you some information I think you’ll find interesting.
R: If you give me your email address, I’ll send it to you tomorrow.

Less effective — single question:
Can I send you some useful information about that?
More effective — COMMENT + REQUEST:
C:
I have a short description of some ways you can avoid that problem.
R: I’d be happy to email it to you.*

*Sometimes a request is implied rather than stated.  With an inquiring tone of voice, an implied request can elicit a positive response, but if necessary, the speaker can add “if you’ll give me your address” (or even more directly: “Could I email it to you?”)

Less effective — single question:
Would you like to schedule a free initial consultation?
More effective — COMMENT + REQUEST:
C:
What we normally do at this point is arrange a meeting to learn more about a client’s needs and determine whether our services are appropriate.  This initial consultation usually takes about 30-40 minutes; it’s free and there’s no obligation to begin a project.
R: Is there a day this week that might work for you?

Less effective — single question:
Could you refer me to other potential clients?
More effective — COMMENT + REQUEST:
C:
We’re always looking for others who could benefit from our help.
R: Can you think of anyone you know who might be interested in our services?

Packaging your points as brief comments + requests can help you get more positive responses from people whose help you need or patronage you want.

* * * * *

Learn with Lloyd! Most people you meet are patient enough to listen for a minute as you describe yourself and your current activities.  However, some people don’t want to listen for more than a minute to such a monologue, and in some situations, you have only a moment to explain yourself … before your conversation is interrupted or your listener has to leave, for example. 

So introducing yourself concisely — in a minute or less — is a valuable skill, and it’s easy to develop!  Such a self-introduction is useful for answering general questions like “What do you do?” or “What kind of work are you looking for?”  Below is a sample speech answering the question “What do you do?”  In this case, the speaker is in a relaxed social setting, so she feels free to add details to enliven the conversation.  Keep in mind that these sentences do not have to be delivered in an unbroken monologue; for example, there could be interrupting questions from the conversation partner that elicit the details that appear in the second half of the speech.

SAMPLE 1 (relaxed social setting): “I work for a non-profit cultural exchange organization called the Slavic Art Center.  We arrange tours of Russia for American artists, designers, architects, and other arts professionals who want to see the cultural treasures of Russia firsthand.  We also bring Russian arts professionals to the United States to meet with their American counterparts.  I’m responsible for travel arrangements, so I spend a lot of time booking flights, hotels, and ground transportation for our groups.  I also write some of our promotional materials.  One benefit I particularly enjoy is the chance to travel with some of our groups in Russia; in fact, I’m going there next month for ten days.  So if you know any American or Russian arts professionals, please let me know!”

Brief self-introductions are sometimes called “elevator speeches”: if you find yourself in an elevator with a potential customer, employer, or other person of interest, you might have 20 seconds, 40 seconds, maybe even 60 seconds to present yourself in a positive way, or promote your products/services or skills/background in a persuasive way.  If the person quoted above found herself in an elevator with a well-known artist or other person who could be interested in her services, she might introduce herself with a shorter, more promotional version of the speech:

SAMPLE 2 (shorter, promotional context):  “Hi, my name’s Jane Smith.  I enjoyed seeing your exhibition tonight; I especially liked the perfumed wood sculptures!  By the way, I work for a non-profit cultural exchange organization called the Slavic Art Center.  We arrange tours of Russia for American artists who want to see Russian culture firsthand.  We also bring Russian artists to the United States to meet their American counterparts.  If you think you might be interested in touring Russia with other artists, or meeting Russian artists when they visit here, I’d be happy to send you more information.”

If you’re not working, talk about your studies or other activities you’re involved in, as well as your future plans.  Here’s a sample from a relaxed social setting, answering the question “What do you do?”:

SAMPLE 3 (relaxed social setting): “I’m studying finance at NYU and planning to apply to MBA programs next year.  I’m currently researching the process of preparing IPOs — that’s initial public offerings: the first time companies offer shares of their stock on a stock market.*  I’m also doing an internship at Nanoventure, a firm that helps arrange IPOs for nanotechnology companies.  I plan to apply to NYU’s Stern Business School, and if I’m accepted, I hope to focus on corporate finance.  Eventually, I’d like to work for a venture capital firm.  I want to help identify small start-ups that could make big breakthroughs and develop innovative products.  So that’s enough about me.  What do you do?”

*Add such a brief explanation or clarification if you think your listener might appreciate it.

If you’re looking for a job, market your skills/interests proactively … but concisely.  For example, you might mention a key aspect of your background, or one of your own professional interests or target areas/specialties, or a direct inquiry or question to the listener.  Here’s a sample adapted from the previous speech:

SAMPLE 4 (shorter, self-promotional context):  “Hi, my name is Sam Jones.  Congratulations on your acquisition of XYZ Corp.!  By the way, I’m doing an internship at Nanoventure, a firm that helps arrange IPOs for nanotechnology companies.  My ultimate goal is to work for a venture capital firm.  I’m just curious if there might be any opportunities for someone like me* at your firm in the near future.”

*You might substitute a descriptive phrase like “new account managers” or “business development specialists

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 To develop your own elevator speech, choose one of the above samples that seems approximately like the way you’d introduce yourself, and replace each sentence with one of your own. Do this for each sentence, one by one, and when you realize you need something different, go for it — make any structural or strategic changes that seem right to you. Naturally, your speech will be quite different from any sample, but using a sample as a starting point can help you get this process moving.

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